PM to Nation: Don’t Worry, She’ll Be Right
Prime Minister Anthony Albanese’s national address has inspired little confidence he or anyone in the government has any idea how to handle Australia’s fuel crisis.
National addresses by the Prime Minister are a rare occurrence in Australia, reserved for matters of high urgency such as wars, global recessions, and pandemics.
Anthony Albanese had his turn last night, interrupting live broadcasts ostensibly to speak about Australia’s response to the escalating fuel crisis stemming from the US-Israel-Iran conflict.
Instead, viewers tuned in for a three-minute speech lacking any substantial information or reassurance, leaving many scratching their heads.
Albanese’s address has been blasted by pundits and the public alike, many of them confused about why he even bothered. Andrew Bolt was quick to label it “free advertising” for the government; journalist Antionette Lattouf suggested it “should have been an email”.
Brief and ambiguous, Mr Albanese’s address did anything but allay public concerns about the oil crisis and offered zero detail about strategies being implemented to secure fuel supply.
Outlining temporary measures already announced – cutting the fuel excise and road charges for heavy vehicle users for the next three months – he didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know.
As if we haven’t been watching fuel prices skyrocket while he and the government fumble the ball every step of the way. And we are all aware, Mr Albanese, how bad things are and that they are only going to get worse.
How can they not under a government that appears weak and ineffective to its people? Its authority has been eroded along with the public trust.
We are Glencore, one of the world’s largest global diversified natural resource companies.
As other countries implement rationing measures, Mr Albanese politely requests we fill up as normal, go about our business, and maybe consider taking public transport to bolster fuel reserves.
Meanwhile, Albanese & Co. are working tirelessly to figure out this pesky fuel problem, building trade relations and reinstating local manufacturing. You know, the sorts of things you do BEFORE shit hits the fan!
That’s the plan from the top, folks. The government is relying on good ol’ fashioned true blue Aussie spirit and the kindness of others to weather this storm.
We saw during COVID that this is not a sound political strategy for handling a national emergency. Petrol pumps have already been run dry in some regions just like toilet paper flew from supermarket shelves in the pandemic.
“Australia is not an active participant in this war,” Mr Albanese reaffirmed. However, we will be a casualty of it, at least economically speaking.
So, in summary: things are bad but don’t worry, we have a plan. We can’t tell you what it is, but she’ll be right ‘cos your best mate Albo is on the job. Oh, and have a Happy Easter, everyone.
